Twinkie?

OMG! Let me start at the beginning. Did I learn a lot tonight! Let me start by saying that at my second job, I have 4 bosses, one of which is Asian. He is awesome, I love him. He is a great boss and great to work with. So, the other bosses know about my impending adoption but are keeping it on the DL for me for now. I have not yet shared my plans with my Asian boss. Why? I am not sure…yes, I am… He is the only Asian person that I converse with on a regular basis and I am unsure of how he will feel about my news. I truly know that he would be happy for me no matter what, but am unsure of how the Asian American community views international adoption first hand. Yes, I know, I am making it out to be that his voice is the voice of an entire community, but you know what I mean. Ok, so back to tonight. While trying to be politically correct, I asked him if he was Korean or Chinese. His response was…”I’m Eskimo!” Ok. I know I can be an idiot at times but I was like “ok”. He then just laughed at me. We’re cool so it was no problem. He then said he was Korean. I told him I just didn’t want to assume one or the other and offend him. Anyway, I spoke of my plans and he asked if he could offer up some advice since he had grown up with a few Korean adoptees. Of course, I welcome any info I can get my hands on. His main advice was to have open communication. Most of the kids that he knew, Korea was not spoken about in the home. They were now American and that was it. Some of the children were extremely introverted and others were very rebellious and angry. Then our conversation turned to racism. He proceeded to ask me an interesting question. Regarding my earlier question if he was Korean or Chinese, he said, would I ask a black person if they were African, Jamaican, or Bohemian or just assume they were American? Ummmm. Crap. Point taken. I told him if I came across someone that seemed Irish, I usually ask if they are Irish or Scottish. Yeah, that worked. I felt like an idiot. He said that this is how you know that some Asians will never truly feel American. I am still scratching my head. I know that I personally didn’t offend him, but…. Then, he says that he is Korean American and that growing up in Church a lot of the “true” Korean children used to tease him and call him a twinkie! A what? A twinkie…you know, yellow on the outside and white on the inside. (His words, not mine) He said most times it was in jest, but sometimes it really hurt. I had never heard the term. I almost started to cry. That’s it, how much time will I get for kicking a child’s butt for name calling!!! I’ll do the time. What did I learn? I learned enough to know that I need to learn a whole lot more!!