***Updating an old post***
Seems every Mother's Day they will play this movie! Kind of connects with my last post in some way. The video is worth watching over and over again. ~Stephe
You know me, I'm never posting anything really deep, unless I'm infurated with something or someone! I've been told that I have a "cupcake" blog and that nothing of any substance is on it. I would disagree but hey, I LOVE cupcakes so I'm fine with it. LOL, but this post is more on a serious note. A note that I've been thinking about for a very long time! How will our children turn out? I mean, how will they view themselves as a transracial adoptee? Will she/he be the "content TRAs, the concerned TRAs, or the angry, bitter TRAs who prefer to be identified as transracial abductees."? I read an amazing article by an 8th grader today, here, that I believe everyone should read.
Everyone's story BEGINS AT BIRTH and this is especially important for us IA parents to realize this. It's important for us to respect their birthparents, culture and birthplace. Not just for them but to take genuine pride in it ourselves. Show our kids that it means something to US not just something we do because we think they should be involved. This post can go off in so many directions and go on forever but I won't...
Bottom line, I don't think we should ever make our children CHOOSE. They don't have to choose Caucasion over Chinese, not US over China, not be able to love both a birthmom and ME! I'm not saying this last part will be easy....
THERE IS ROOM FOR BOTH...ALWAYS... isnt' there.
This is the clip I've been wanting to post forever...break out the tissues and think of your little one when they are all grown up... (sorry, it might be the ugly cry for some of you)
15 comments:
Stephe,
I just watched that movie the other night. It always makes me cry. It is so true though.
Kathy
Stephe ...I haven't watched the video yet, but I will. I just wanted to comment on the "cupcake" blog with "nothing of substance" comment. WTF? It's your blog I run to when I need information. Your blog has been a lifeline for me. I've gotten LOADS of information and ideas from your blog. You've touched my heart, my thoughts and my life. Thanks for all you do.
Hugs,
Lori**
No worries Lori, I'm not offended by the label "cupcake". I do put a lot of baby shopping and puppy stuff on it!! LOL. Stephe
Lori, you are just too sweet! What would I do with out you and my ECG's!!! Stephe
I loved that movie when I was a stepmom, but now I see how it applies to my life now. I will be the "keeper" of Claire's past, filling in the blanks for her. But she is my future now and I am hers.
I am so glad you read that essay it was beautifully written from the heart and touched me beyond words. I think this clip is beautiful and I have never seen the movie so I am adding it to Netflix. In regard to the content of the essay and the clip we are on the same page with that...
Love ya girl
ECG
Susan :)
Stephe... I just have to say THANKS for posting this. This clip to me is a tribute (in our case) to the mother who cared enough to place our daughter in the perfect finding place so that she could have a better life and to us for being so grateful for her doing so, so that our little ones would have a chance at a life that she wished for her daughter let alone give US a chance to live a life realizing our dream. I see our adoptions as an unselfishness on both sides and all we can do is love our daughters granting them the best from both ourselves and their birthmothers.
hugs to you... and thank you for the opportunity for feeling this way...
Wanda
I'm also responding the to "cupcake" remark, which seems to imply that blogs should only impart depthful, insightful and socially relevent information. For me, reading a blog written by someone else who is going through what I'm going through is priceless. It's a seven layer cake, to extend the metaphor. I appreciate not feeling alone in this journey to a daughter in China.
So, bring on the cupcake!
And by the way, I agree with the other poster that you have a great mix of info and fun stuff.
Nina
LID 2/06/06
Hey Cupcakes are my favorite and you are one of my favorite blogs to visit becuase there is always something funny, interesting or thought provoking...
next subject....thank you for sharing....
dawn in sac
www.talesfromthebigtomato.blogspot.com
Hey Steph!
That was a great clip. I saw the movie and loved it. Very powerful..I love movies like that. You've got a great blog girl, wealth of info and insight!
Maggie
2-17-06
I don't think your blog is "cupcake" at ALL. Your article on useless baby shower items has made me see the light-I was clueless before that. I love reading other people's blogs while we wait-helps me to know there are others out there and what they do to pass the time. I hope your referral comes soon-keep blogging!
Michelle LID 11/28/07
http://babyfunjourney.blogspot.com/
I love that movie... The realistic ideals presented lead one to recognize that a child is full of boundless love. And we, as adoptive parents, need to whole heartedly love our children's birth parents for the child they produced and the choices that they made to give their son/daughter a life worth living! My son asks me about his birth parents very regularly... I hope he never quits asking questions and I am prepared to help him search for them when the time comes!!! Thank you for this amazing reminder at what we have been given!
This movie always make me cry!
Cupcake....that is funny! I love your blog just the way it is and that's why I keep coming back.
My blog is mostly pictures and little snippets of our lives together and those who visit know what to expect. Funny that people want to always label everything in life!
I am the mother of a transracial adopted son and I often struggle with these issues myself. He doesn't have to choose HOWEVER, at 10 years old...he often expresses that he wants to choose. I believe that this will happen along the way with him but that when he is old enough to really understand how much we both love him and that his allowing himself to love both of us will only enhance his life.
My situation is a bit different, however, because his biological mother is a known person to both of us and not someone in the abstract.
Keep doing what you're doing...you are a great mom!
Happy Mother's Day!
Your "cupcake" blog was full of info prior to G's arrival. I was constantly astounded at the info! Now you're doing what you should be-spending time with your baby and snapping a few shots which you are generous enough to share with us! Being a single mom who works full time doesn't allow for a lot of time for other things if you want some sleep to keep up with the little one! I think your blog is Beeeyootiful! =)
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